Xel's Song
by StarChibi
Summary: Songfic. I just like re-posting this ^_^ Abandoned by his Mistress, Xelloss is dying, alone. Will anyone be able to help him? Will any one even care......-little X/F


_Author Notes_: I don't know what's gotten into me. Sad songfic…I don't know how it will end yet…the song is Blink182's Adam's Song. 

_Disclaimer:_ I don't own Slayers or Blink 182 OR their songs…and I swear I'm not writing this for profits. Like anyone pays me for avoiding my  homework. 

Xel's Song 

I never thought I'd die alone 

_I laughed the loudest who'd have known?_

_I traced the cord back to the wall_

_No wonder it was never plugged in at all_

They'd all gone now, he was alone. For the first time he was truly and utterly alone. His mistress had a new priest- general- she'd told him to get a life. Seeking revenge for all he'd done in the past, Mazoku had hunted him down, a human dazed and sapped of energy. Now he lay here- in the middle of nowhere. The people he'd almost begun to consider his friends- they'd left too. Lina and Gourry were on the other side of the world, and Zelgadis- well, he wouldn't help. Amelia was tending her throne in her kingdom. A bitter smile twisted his bloody lips as he tried to pull himself up to his feet. The times they had had together had been fun.

_I took my time, I hurried up_

_The choice was mine I didn't think enough_

_I'm too depressed to go on_

_You'll be sorry when I'm gone_

Would they miss him? Would they even notice that he'd gone? Unlikely. They'd merely tolerated him, although he suspected Gourry didn't mind him around as long as he didn't hurt his friends, and Amelia, though she despised his once-true nature, seemed to like him. Lina- she tolerated him. Consider him a friend? Possibly, but not many people did. Perhaps if he hadn't been a Mazoku…and there was that dragon girl, Filia. 

He could feel his life slipping, and he concentrated on the memories. Filia- feisty dragon ex-priestess. Where was she now? He didn't know, he'd purposely avoiding looking for her these past few months. She certainly wouldn't care.

_I never conquered, rarely came_

_Sixteen just held such better days_

_Days when I still felt alive_

_We couldn't wait to get outside_

She'd called him "Namagomi". Funny- he used to hate that name, and fell like ripping her limb from limb when she said it, but now- he found himself smiling, remembering in the memory with bittersweet fondness. What was this? Fondness towards the priestess? But he felt the same for Lina- and even Amelia, and a strange kind of friendship with the dumb blonde swordsman Gourry. Zelgadis- well, he was entertaining. 

Xelloss grabbed a tree branch and tried to pull himself to his feet, but fell back on the ground, coughing blood and leaving a trail on blood on the wood. 

_The world was wide, too late to try_

_The tour was over I'd survived_

_I couldn't wait till I got home_

_To pass the time in my room alone_

So he'd go alone. He wished- he could see them, one last time. He only had memories, now. Just wisps…the pain was incredible. Xelloss wiped the blood away from his mouth, but it kept coming. His purple hair was drenched his sweat and blood, and his clothes were torn and bloody. Blood. It was a new experience he'd prefer to to have had. Would his friends be pleased he was human? It was possible- then they could treat him like a friend, trust him.

And he realised with the clarity of one dying- he wanted to be trusted. Be one of them, a friend not an acquaintance. Well then- Xelloss slumped against a tree and shut his eyes, cuddling the memories of the two years in his heart, the last possession he had that no one could take away.

_I never thought I'd die alone_

_Another six months I'll be unknown_

_Give all my things to all my friends_

Xelloss felt his resistance draining away. Where could he go, what could he do? Nothing. No one who knew him would trust him, no one would care. He didn't care anymore. So many things he'd wanted to do- he'd thought he'd have forever. Why didn't anyone come?

No one wanted to. No one would. No one would care.

_You'll never set foot in my room again_

_You'll close it off, board it up_

_Remember the time that I spilled the cup_

_Of apple juice in the hall_

_Please tell mum this is not her fault_

Footsteps, or was it his imagination? Xelloss winced as the pain escalated enough to make him want to scream. He could feel his hands, holding his side together, were caked in his blood and covered in the red liquid. Distant voices, a child's, worried. Innocence. A thing he'd never had- Filia had had it, when he'd first met her. Her experience in the world had changed the priestess. 

He'd been surprised when she'd said she would look after Val, but Filia was a kind, considerate person. 

Filia might be able to help him, but she wouldn't. She couldn't. Where was she?

_I never conquered, rarely came_

_But tomorrow holds such better days_

_Days when I can still feel alive_

_When I can't wait to get outside_

Xelloss groaned and hunched over his stomach, his blood-soaked hair hanging in front of his closed eyes. Closed neither in sleep nor pleasure, but in pain. Gods- it hurt. It hurt like hell. Running footsteps, fading.

It was like he was falling. His senses were becoming dull. Filia couldn't help him. He was going to die. Salty tears traced their way through the dirt and blood on his cheek. This was it then. The end of everything. He retched, blood was everywhere and he cried to himself, hunched over his stomach. 

Damn.

'Filia…'Xelloss whispered, blood flicking on the end of his tongue. Footsteps were loud. 

_The world is wide, too late to try_

_The tour is over, I've survived_

'Xelloss?' it was a familiar voice, and almost disbelieving. 'Namagomi?'

'Mummy?'

The child. Xelloss grimaced, and then felt the lightest of touches on his shoulder, like an angel's feather. 

'Xelloss- what happened to you?'

Her hand slid under his chin and lifted his head. He stared into those blue eyes- almost- concerned? He could no longer feel her emotions. 

'You're human.' She whispered, and her gaze didn't move from his despairing gaze. 'I-Xel-'

'Mummy? Who is he?'

Xelloss didn't look away from her face, the beautiful angel- this was Filia! Yes. He knew that. One was here.

He'd missed teasing her the most. Or was it just…her presence? He relaxed, falling into her arms and shutting his eyes. He could feel her arms wrap tentatively around his shoulders, and the healing power of white magic. Tears touched his cheeks, not his own. She was crying- over him? He reached up and took the hand on his shoulder loosely, and took a deep breath.

'Filia…'

_I can't wait till I get home_

_To pass the time in my room alone…_


End file.
